How often do we let other people’s behavior or words decide our mood? Each one of us, today is living like a trash bin- we are full of anger, disappointment, frustration and negativity. When the trash bin fills up, we look for a place to dump the trash, and sometimes if people allow us, we even dump it onto them. We may not have the power to control everything around us, but we do have a choice. We can either react or respond. So, when someone wants to dump it on you, don’t take it personally. Just smile, pray for their well-being and move on. Don’t let the garbage spread to your work, family and friends.
That being said, there are times when things blow out of proportion, and there’s an upheaval of emotions. At such times, we need to take conscious efforts to refocus on what’s important in our lives.
Why is it that we are good, loving and caring to others but critical of ourselves?
We were born to be limitless, but we became limited by our own thoughts, bad memories and belief systems. Don’t let this weigh you down and make you feel limited. There is a difference between how we truly are and how we see ourselves. These blockages stem from our past experiences and circumstances, sometimes even due to our genes. We need to release them now so that the rest of our lives are spent freely sans any baggage.
Our self-talk, the internal dialogue that we have with ourselves starts developing in our childhood. Then, how does one go about shifting these childhood patterns?
Don’t let your emotions and thinking patterns define your identity. Therefore, practice releasing the emotional trash from your body often during the day. These could be anxiety, fear, and worry, feeling unsafe, criticized or unworthy.
How do you do that? To release the emotional trash, follow the below steps:
The first step is the INTENT. Till there is no intent to grow, nothing can change. Say this to yourself multiple times in the day, “I intend to release this pain/worry/grief from my body right away. I know I’ll be fine and happier without it.” Confront those painful experiences and emotions. Each time you feel uneasy, don’t ignore the feeling. Don’t be in denial. It always pays to accept the emotions and not abandon them. Accept fully that it is a part of you NOW.
Next step is to take action. Ask yourself, “What is it trying to tell me?” You may not get an answer immediately but give yourself some time to experience the emotion.
Most importantly, visualize a life free from these blockages. Recall the emotion that is bothering you. Play every scene well in your mind. For every negative thought that you get, think what’s the best that can happen. Visualization meditation is a very powerful technique to stop this unhealthy emotional processing.
Put it down on paper
Keep writing, keep writing, and don’t think. Let the words flow naturally. Tear this paper into the smallest of pieces and burn it to ashes because it no longer lives inside you.
Blow a Balloon
Blow a balloon while putting in all your negative thoughts, things that caused pain hurt and resentment. The only rule is you need to blow till the balloon bursts on its own.
Practice assertive communication
Learn to say no without explaining yourself.
Practice mindfulness by observing your thoughts and emotions and not being in them. There’s a difference between, ‘I am irritated right now’ and “I am irritated’. Hence, mindfulness helps us to separate ourselves from our thoughts and emotions.
Emotional Trash can be emptied by using the above steps. Always remember, ten per cent of life is how you make it, the other ninety per cent is how you take it. Therefore, it only makes sense to love the people who treat us right and pray for the ones who don’t.